Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Be Honest When You're Angry With God

Happy New Year's Eve, loves!

It is the day before the beginning of the new year and I'd like to share a guest post I recently wrote for I'm happy to share this piece since we're at the end of 2014 and I believe this is the best time to address "hidden" anger and frustration we might have carried throughout the year.

My hope is that the message in this post resonates with you and helps you greatly.

So, without further ado, here is my guest post, "Be Honest When You're Angry With God" ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Most of us are afraid to admit that we get angry with God.

I mean it’s not something most preachers address in their sermons. It’s considered taboo to even think that you could get angry and upset with God. But the truth remains that there are times when we feel angry at God.

And as the saying goes, the first step in healing is admittance.”

I can only imagine the number of people angry at God this Christmas season. People that had certain expectations of what God would do for them that did not come to pass. For some of you, you expected to get a “man” by Christmas but you find yourself rocking the “single” hat this December again. For some of you, you expected to have a baby by Christmas but you find yourself still without a child. For some of you, you expected healing from sickness for you or a loved one but it didn’t come to pass. For some of you, you expected to get a specific job or car or relationship or business growth or whatever else…all of which DID NOT HAPPEN.

And so, you’re angry at God. You feel lied to you. You feel like you’ve been shafted. You feel like He’s blessing everyone else around you…except you!

You feel sad and/or depressed.

Well, I know what it means to be angry at God. I’ve been angry at God quite a bit this year. I’ve been angry at God about the increasing number of spiritual challenges and tests I’ve gone through this year.  I’ve been angry at God for some of the suffering I’ve gone through. I’ve been angry at God about all the opposition I’ve gotten from people for making a committed effort to live for God and share godly truths through my writing and speaking engagements. I’ve been angry at God about all the people that seem to happily indulge in ungodly behavior yet are “succeeding” (as per the world’s definition) and living the “high life” with no immediate or evident repercussions. I’ve been angry at God quite a bit this year.

And on one of those days this year when I was venting my anger to God with tears streaming down my face, something very funny happened.

I heard God laugh.

At ME.

Why was God laughing at me?
And so because I believe God answers our questions, I asked why. And the next thing I heard in my spirit was, Because you are foolish.”



And then the Holy Spirit filled me with the understanding of just how foolish I had been…and unfortunately, how foolish many of you are too.

You see, anger towards God is usually due to one of two reasons:

1. We believe that God is our “sugar daddy” and we are entitled to get everything we want

2. We believe favor from God is supposed to exempt us from suffering.

I’m sorry folks but God has never been and will never be our “sugar daddy”.  He does not have “all we want” at heart but instead our “BEST interest” at heart (which isn’t always what we want.)
Now when it comes to the suffering part, I have a bit of tough news – it’s NOT optional.

God does not have “the most comfortable life” planned out for us.

Part of our lives will include test, trials, obstacles, and challenges that are all meant to DEVELOP and ENHANCE our character and faith. (It’s been that way for great men and women of God from the beginning of time).

It serves a GOOD function.

And yes, it is true that we are created to fulfill great purpose and enjoy great promises in our lives; but, all of that is dependent on OBEDIENCE to God’s Will and TRUST in God’s Word (even when we don’t like how our situations look).

That’s what true love for God really looks like. It’s having enough gratitude and respect to obey and trust God.
So, as you enter 2015, I implore you to START GETTING YOUR HEART RIGHT. Stop setting unrealistic expectations. Stop expecting God to have all of your desires at heart. Some of the things you desire are not actually good for you; and in some cases, you’re just not ready to have them yet. Start expecting God to have your BEST interest at heart.

Stop running around upset that you are not receiving the promises of God when you have refused to follow the instructions of God. Start studying and obeying God’s Word. (I know there are some godly instructions I haven’t followed and because of that there are some godly promises I am yet to receive. If I want that to change, I have to increase my level of obedience!)

Stop remaining in anger towards God for testing you and taking out your frustrations on everyone around you – understand that suffering breeds strength and there is no growth without “growing pains”.

Stop trying to “hide” your anger from God. Tell Him the truth instead.

Pour out your anger to Him. Pour out your frustrations to Him. Tell Him you love Him but you don’t understand why things are the way they are. Tell Him you don’t understand His ways sometimes. Tell Him you don’t like His ways sometimes. Tell Him the truth! And then after you tell Him the truth, do the most important thing: Ask God to help you understand His ways and give you peace about His ways.

He will.

And then you’ll begin to understand that His ways are ALWAYS the BEST – even in those times when it feels like pain, suffering, and disappointment. His ways always lead to His glory, your fulfillment, joy, and redemption.

Make 2015 your greatest year yet by being honest with God about your feelings, every step of the way, and accepting that there’s a PROCESS to PROGRESS. Start counting and actively thanking God for every blessing you do have and stop tallying all the things you think you’re “without”.  Don’t allow hidden feelings of anger and unrealistic expectations of an unchallenging journey to keep you from the great life meant for you.

Let’s step into 2015 with renewed faith in God, honesty with God, and complete trust in God.
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  1. I always take putting my emotions at the feet of God in prayers seriously.. When u see God as your friend it will be easier for you to do dat.. Above everything it is important we know that God's plan for us are way better than our plans for ourselves.. Happy new year in advance.

    1. Thank you, Ifeoma! Happy New Year to you too, my dear :)

      I'm glad you've already made it a practice of baring all to God in your prayers and you remind yourself that God's plans for us are always better than ours. It wasn't until recent years that I started being honest with God about my feelings and I wish I had known to do it sooner in my life because there is nothing like an open and honest relationship with God. I know there are many believers and Christians out there that haven't got the proper message about this and have been shortchanging themselves from growing in their faith walk, like I did for a long time. I hope this post helps a lot of them and gives them some necessary understanding and peace.

  2. yep 2014 the year, I stopped being silent and vent to God.
    Yesterday, I went through your instagram handle and I chuckled. I said God after venting I expected you to speak to me. Have a dialogue with me. Not guide me to this instagram handle that points out the answers to my question.

    As I said my prayer this morning I had to break down and cry.. y i have said this over and over. Being over a decade one crisis to another. Being hopeful.

    I would not hurt my child to teach a lesson?

    Good to know there are people out there with similar situations.

    We are all built with ambitions and desires. We have the right to good things the right way. To know your worth it's not a crime.

    When false prophets have the effrontery to be lurking about town and milking people for money for their salvation. All the Lord says by the fruits you know them. These characters put people in bondage.

    Accountability is a strange word to all.

    1. I love the way divine intervention works! I'm so happy you were able to see this post and get comfort from it when you needed it.

      As for crying, my dear cry it out! I have cried more in recent years than ever before and I think it is a great practice of spiritual catharsis that we need to do more often. And yes, please remain hopeful. Why?

      I'm understanding more and more these days the scripture where God says, "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are my ways your ways." (Isaiah 55:8)

      There are things we, in our limited human minds, consider "negative" and "unnecessary" that God considers important for our spiritual growth and in deepening our relationship with Him and love for Him. I too have had thoughts like, "why would a loving God allow His children to get hurt and feel pain and suffer?" As I study my Bible more, I realize that we have been spoon-fed a societal definition of "love" from our early years that isn't necessarily God's definition of love. God is love and it is defined on His terms. God's love includes grace, mercy, favor...and it also includes justice and judgment. Growth is a part of love and "growing pains" are a part of growth. So, my prayer for you (and I - it can get hard o!) is to draw closer to God more which will result in greater understanding and appreciation of God's love as it truly is. God bless you, my dear!

  3. Hey Ada, thank you so much for yeilding yourself to be used by God. I normally dont leave comments, but i just had to leave a comment today. I don't know how i stumbled on your blog but some how i am subcribed to your blog. And this post is exactly what i need entering into the new year.

    I look at the life of my siblings and i see how everything is just falling in place for them, in career, in relationship, in finances and my own story is different.

    so yes i have been very angry with God, why am i the odd one out among my siblings, why have i experienced delay, but i have not really told God how i feel. Like you said we have that mentality that it's a taboo to be angry with God, or even tell him that we are angry with him. Yet we forget that God knows us even more than we know ourselves so he knows we are angry with him, all he wants from us is to talk to him and tell him everything we need and that peace of God that passeth all understanding will fill our hearts.

    Thank you Ada, and i pray that God gives you more grace and keeps you grounded in his word, i pray that his year you will be favored and promotion does not come from man but from God, this year you will experience uncommon promotion in all that you lay your hands on in Jesus name.

    1. My dear, I understand you completely! Family comparisons can make you feel like you're lacking or not measuring up somehow in your life - a feeling I'm familiar with. Admit it all to God! We are human and thoughts/feelings of all kinds will come our way - and when they are the ones that take us farther from our love, gratitude, and trust in God, take them to Him and ask that he gives you His peace that gives you the strength to be joyful even when you're feeling insecure about your life. And every time the feelings come back (I know how they like to keep messing with a person!), take them back to God; if it means everyday, take them to God everyday.

      And know that while things look like you're the "odd" one or the "lacking" one, what God means for you will be for you when He believes the time is right for you to receive it. Also, we must remember that He requires us to be in obedience of His Will - ask God to use you for His purpose and know that when you honor God with your life, He will be with you and his graces will overflow in your life. It just requires our trust because part of the process truly is delay because the period of delay produces endurance in us and that develops our moral character and that strengthens our faith in God, which is what the apostle Paul mentions in scripture.

      Keep challenging yourself to trust God and know that as long as you are in Him, it is well with you and will always be. (This is the same challenge I am constantly giving myself because I can get doubtful and insecure too).

      God bless you, my dear! And thank you for your wonderful prayers - I receive them all o :)