Monday, May 12, 2014

5 Reasons He Won't Marry You

Relationships can seem so confusing.

The good ol’ “men are from Mars and women are from Venus” theme has been at the heart of many successful rom-coms.  As ladies, we find ourselves asking the same set of universally insecure questions. "Does he like me?" "Doesn't he like me?" "Will he marry me?" "When will he marry me?"

Truth: Men really aren't as complicated as we make them out to be.  

In fact, a man with true knowledge of his God-given purpose and a vision for his life is even easier to understand. There are obvious red flags that will turn him off from some women and certain positive signs that will turn him on to others. These red flags/positive signs play a huge role in determining if he will have an interest in marrying you or not. Here are 5 red flags that will more-likely-than-not send him running for the hills instead of walking down the aisle.

1.    Your Outfits Are Embarrassing
 What are you wearing? Seriously, what are you wearing? You might want to retire the bra-less shirts and club dresses, ladies. I’m not the fashion police but you need to know that men take this into account when they look at you. There’s no doubt that his eyes will light up when you pass by in your skintight and low-cut dress, but soon after his brain will kick into gear and he’ll realize you’re freely showing off your goodies to every single man in the area. He’ll begin to doubt your self-worth and possibly see you as a desperate attention-seeker. When a man is wondering if you’ll make a good wife he is also wondering, “Will I be proud to call her my daughter’s mother?” So, if you’re interested in being considered as a potential wife, you don’t want to make him question whether he can bring you home to mama in that outfit. Chances are he’ll decline.

2.    You Have No Respect For Money
 How much food do you order at dinner? When you go to a restaurant are you ordering your meal and then meals-to-go for momma, Sister Jennie, cousin Fran, and nephew Sam? Are you sending him monthly texts reminding him that it’s time to get your nails done and your hair did? Are you expecting pearls and necklaces every holiday? You haven’t even married him yet and you’re comfortably tapping out his bank account. It’s evident you have no respect for the money he earned. Do you really think he will be comfortable making a lifetime commitment of financial depletion to you?

3.    You Have No Vision
Do you know your God-given purpose? Do you care? Do you have a vision that your marriage is part of? Are you confident in God’s love for you and the abilities he has placed within you? Do you care? A purposeful man wants a purposeful woman. If your answer is “no” to the previous questions, there’s a good chance his answer will be “NO” to marrying you.

4.    You Talk Too Much
How many friends do you have? Are you always calling and texting your friends about something that just happened or something someone just did? Are you always talking about other people’s relationship problems and how messed up they are? Are you always laughing at her hair or her clothes or her shoes? There’s a good chance he’s not interested in inviting a first-class gossip, and the headache that follows, into his house or his life.

5.    You Can’t Cook
What will he eat? What will you eat? Will it be Chinese takeout every night? Will it be Subway for lunch every day? You can choose to believe that cooking isn't an important factor but part of the joy of marriage is knowing that certain perks come with the union – your wife cooking a meal out of love is one of them. If you insist on never setting foot in the kitchen, you send the message that you are unwilling to go the extra mile to show him love and appreciation. He just might not be happy with the idea of that for the next 40, 50, or 60+ years.

Now I know no two men are the same. I know that some men might not consider whether you can cook or not a deal breaker. I know that you are your own individual and no one can force you to do anything. I also know that there are many, many women sitting at home right now wondering why they haven’t gotten married yet and praying for God to send them their "Adam". I also know that there are many, many men who aren't married that would love to be married but don’t feel like they come across any homely, considerate, respectable, and purposeful women. All I’m saying is if most of the points above apply to you and you are single & unhappy, you might want to consider making some changes that will ultimately benefit your life, as well as his. 

What are your thoughts on these? Do you disagree? Do you know any other husband-repellent attributes that should have made the list? Leave a comment below:)

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  1. Well I don't know how I ran across you on g+ but all I can say is I enjoyed the blog. From 1-5 you're right. I possess all qualities, and I'm not yet married. My whole thing is settling for the men not worthy of my self-worth. I wrote one myself about the men who want to be married but aremt

  2. Thank you for visiting, Ladii! And thank you for your honesty. I know I've made mistakes when dealing with guys. I was careless with my dressing and operated with no vision.

  3. You know, I think submission is a serious point for women who want to get married. It wasn't put here, but I think if you don't agree to be less important and give your partner more attention it doesn't work. Just like john the Baptist accepted to be less important so jesus could be given more attention.

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