Thursday, April 3, 2014

So, You Want A Great Husband?

You’ve got some patience and work cut out for you, ladies. 

Yes, that’s right, PATIENCE and WORK. I've said it before and I'll say it again: nothing of value is ever easy to come by; if it comes easily, it goes even quicker than it came. Naturally, this philosophy applies to attracting a great husband. I believe that as a single gal, there are two steps you must take to remain open and prepared to receive your great husband. 

1.       Stop Begging – Enough is enough. The “please like me” or “please love me” attitude that we carry when we are around men has got to go. Begging for love and attention from men is an awful job. (I should know; I’ve indulged in my fair share of begging behavior). It is desperation. I don’t care how good-looking you might be, desperation is still one of the ugliest characteristics on the planet. You can always spot a desperate woman in a room; you can almost smell it on her. Desperation is an insult to our life and quite frankly, to our Creator. It is a clear sign that we have forgotten who our God is and have turned our attention from Him. It is a clear sign that we have confused men for gods. 

      Big mistake.

      Men are not the ones we should be fighting for in our lives. They are not the ones who hold the keys to the kingdom of happiness and fulfillment. They are not exclusive accessories to be fought for. Stop fighting to get a man or you'll very likely end up with the wrong one. (If you don't believe me, check out the current divorce rates.) If you want to fight to have a man in your life, fight for the Son of Man – fight for Jesus Christ. Focus your eyes and attention on Him and trust God’s timing in your life. When you are meant to meet and be joined to your husband, you will. In the meantime, be GRATEFUL for what you have and enjoy your God-given life.

2.       Become a Great Wife – The truth: like attracts like. You get from the world what you give to it. If you want a great husband, you have to become a great wife. That means as a single gal, you need to start building your value NOW. Take a look at your “Perfect Man” list, or as I like to call it for many ladies your “Everything-I-Want-From-A-Man-That-I-Don’t-Have-To-Offer” list. It’s time for YOU to step up to the plate too. Do you want a man that is God-fearing who will love and respect you? You better start spending time with Christ and practicing His teachings on showing love to all people that you encounter in your life. Do you want a man that is intelligent and witty? You better get off Facebook or the gossip blogs and start reading a book. Do you want a man that is a leader? You better start exercising courage in your own life by openly claiming what you believe and setting standards based on your faith. Do you want a man that is ambitious? You better stop “chilling and doing nothing” and instead figure out your God-given purpose and start working towards your visions. Do you want a man that will be kind and forgiving towards you? You better start being kind and forgiving towards those who currently offend you (even though you won’t always want to). Do you want a man who knows how to exercise self-control and put the best interest of your relationship over his sinful desires? You better start saying “NO” to Tom, Dick, and Harry when your hormones are raging on a Saturday night and they’ve invited you over to “hangout”. And the list goes on. 

There you have it single ladies. Your 2-Step Guide to getting your great husband. Forget that people tell you“there’s a shortage of good men” or “you’re getting too old”.

They are illusions. 

The shortage is in their minds. There are over 7 billion people on this earth; you haven’t even met ¼ of the men out there. As for the age conundrum, where is the statistical data that shows you MUST get married by a certain age or married women of a younger age are happier than those who married later on? Exactly. Another illusion. The age requirement for marriage is also in their minds. Ignore them. Use this single period in your life as a time to build your relationship with Christ, discover your God-given purpose and how you are meant to serve others, and develop yourself as a woman of value.  

Leave your husband to God and His timing. 

If you find this difficult to do in the current environment you’re in - people, TV shows, social media sites, blogs, etc - then I suggest you start changing your environment. 


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  1. As usual, u said it all and missed not any vital detail.. :)

    1. Thanks Nma:)
      I learn and I share. And then of course, I am forced to re-learn many lessons again.