I’ve always been a sensitive soul.
I’ve always found it easy to feel the pain of others. I’m the girl who cries in dramatic movies about the drug addict who continuously tries to get clean but is never quite able to get back to sobriety. Or the abandoned orphan who never feels loved by anyone and fears abandonment from every person in their life. Or the overly insecure, “unpretty” loser in high school who starts sleeping with jocks just to become popular and ends up contracting an STD. Granted, I’ve never been a drug addict, I have both of my parents (THANK GOD), and I never went on a wild sex spree (even though I’d definitely be considered a high school loser). As a writer and lover of storytelling, I’m not surprised that I connect with such troubled characters – they’re always the more layered and complex ones, like actual people. The problem is I started getting confused by movies. I started believing that a sob-story gave people (including myself) the right to give up. On themselves, on others, on their lives, and on their God-given purpose. It doesn’t. Truth:
Life is NOT fair.
It never has been and it never will be. It’s not fair that Helen Keller was born blind. It’s not fair that Nelson Mandela spent 27 years in prison for a noble cause. It’s not fair that the most wonderful and innocent person to have ever existed was crucified on a cross for sinners like you and me. It’s not fair that some people are born into the spoils of riches and others into the depths of poverty. No, it’s not fair. Now let me remind you of some other unfair things.
It’s not fair that many, many years ago a skinny shepherd boy was chosen to be king of Israel over his older, stronger, and more eager brothers (King David). It’s not fair that some of us have had three-square meals throughout our lives and some children across the globe barely get one meal a day. If you want to get even more current with it, it’s not fair that Lupita won the Oscar for her first feature film and Leonardo DiCaprio has starred in over 30 features and has received…not one. As you can see, unfairness spreads across the board in life – when you are excelling and when you are suffering. Now that you know that, why will you allow unfairness to destroy your life?
You can spend your life looking at things as if the odds are against you or as if the odds are there for you as growing pains on your way to a great life. You can look at yourself as a loser in life or as a winner in God born to be used in service of others through your God-given purpose. You can moan and complain daily about how unfair the government/judicial system is towards minorities or you can study hard, go to law school, and work your way up to a state representative position where you can actually have a say-so in legislature passed. You can complain that you’re not “pretty enough” and all the good job opportunities go to the pretty girls or you can focus on becoming attractive, loving yourself as a Godly creation, and making a significantly positive impact on your world by developing your talents and skills in your field. You can shake your head at the wickedness, betrayal, and judgment people have towards each other or you can choose to better yourself each day and show others through your actions how to be better themselves (“Monkey see, monkey do”).
You can choose any way to go – it is always YOUR choice. Unfairness has never stood in the way of that. It might make it harder for you than for someone else but like I’ve said before, nothing worth having is ever easy – it just depends how much you want it. If you’re waiting for life to be fair before you choose to live greatly and help others greatly, you’ll be waiting ‘til the day you die.
Disclaimer: I am not discrediting anyone's pain. I've felt pain, I still do, and it is always 100% real. I still cry when I watch sad and heart-wrenching films. I still feel immense compassion for people in life that have gone through heavy tragedy and keep fighting to overcome it yet feel so overwhelmed. I still catch myself getting angry at times at the unfairness of it all. But then I remember, God never said the world would be a fair place. God never said we would all experience the same trials and tribulations. What God did say was that no matter what we face, we can rise above it as long as we choose Him to help us. Yet, people keep relying on themselves and on other people instead of God. The problem is we aren't strong enough.
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